Q: What is a Thermite Torpedo?
A: It's a highly advanced, extremely dangerous, and totally-not-real type of missile that's secretly being developed in a hidden underground bunker by a team of expertly trained, highly caffeinated engineers.
Q: What is the purpose of these Torpedos?
A: The purpose of Thermite Torpedos is to destroy all that is good and pure in this world, replacing it with an endless expanse of darkness and despair.
Q: Will the Torpedos be able to achieve world domination?
A: Oh, absolutely! With our advanced thermite-based propulsion system and an army of highly trained, highly motivated, and moderately paid interns, the world will be ours in no time.
Check the launch schedule to see when the Torpedos will be unleashed on the world!
Learn more about the advanced technology behind the Torpedos!
Q: Can I buy Thermite Torpedos merchandise?
A: Ha! You wish. But, we'll be offering a limited edition "I survived the Torpedo Apocalypse" t-shirt, available only on our merchandise page!