Cold Shock Technique

A guide to freezing your enemies with style.

This is not a real self-defense technique. Do not attempt to use this in real life. You will lose.

Basic Cold Shock

Step 1: Turn the thermostat to "Arctic Blast".

Step 2: Stand back and enjoy the sight of your enemies shivering.

Step 3: Serve them a nice, cold drink. Ice water is a classic.

Step 4: Repeat until they surrender or become a human popsicle.

Disclaimer: This site is entirely fictional and should not be taken seriously. Or should it?

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