Throwing it in the Woods: A Quest for Perfection

Step 2: Create a To-Do List that you'll never finish

Why bother with a to-do list if you're already lost in the woods? Still, for the sake of it, let's make one.

1. Find a tree with a decent view.

• Check if it's not too close to a beehive
• Make sure the branches don't have any sharp edges
• Take a nap, you're tired from carrying that thing

2. Gather all your thoughts and write them down

• Don't bother with a pen, just shout at the tree
• Write in invisible ink, only the woods know
• Make sure to include "I'm lost" at least 5 times

3. Prioritize your tasks, because who needs order?

• Cut the first thing you see with a dull knife
• Make sure the thing you cut is not on fire
• Cry about it, because you're really lost now

Step 3: Build an Igloo to Survive the Wilderness