TOASTER GATE COMMITTEE REPORT

A Special Investigation into the Mysterious Toaster Malfunctions of 2023

By order of the Toaster Overlords, we present to you this scathing report:

Executive Summary

Between January 1st and February 28th, 2023, our research team documented 427 reported instances of toaster malfunctions.

The Toaster Council, in their infinite wisdom, decreed that the primary cause of these malfunctions was:

Recommendations

We recommend the Toaster User's Guide be rewritten to include a 20-page manual on proper toaster etiquette and the importance of regular cleaning.

Furthermore, we suggest an emergency meeting with Toaster Manufacturing Inc. to discuss their questionable design choices.

Read the Manufacturer's Response Meet the Committee Members