TOASTER GATE PHASE 3 BRIEFING

TOASTERGATE IS A GLOBAL CRISIS OF EPIC PROPORTIONS.

We have evidence that ToasterCorp CEO, Mr. B. Toasterstein, has been using company funds to purchase 5000 gallons of artisanal, small-batch jam.

This is a clear case of corporate malfeasance and we demand answers.

Phase Three: Investigation and Phase Three: Press Conference are now live.