Theory 1: The Toaster is a Portal to Another Dimension
It's true! The Toaster is not just a kitchen appliance, but a gateway to a world of infinite toast possibilities. Don't believe me? Just look at the toaster's glowing red eyes.
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Theory 2: The Toaster is a Mind Control Device
Think about it. The Toaster's constant beeping and flashing lights can drive you mad. It's like a miniature microwave oven for your sanity.
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Theory 3: The Toaster is a Time Machine
It's a time machine! Just insert your toast, set the timer, and press the button. You'll be back in 1975, when toaster technology was still in its prime.