Twisted Crumpet Recipe

Warning: This recipe is not for the faint of heart. It's for the bravest of souls who dare to defy the conventions of traditional crumpet-making.

Ingredients:

• 1 cup of courage
• 1/2 cup of recklessness
• 3 tablespoons of madness
• 2 cups of despair

Instructions:

1. Mix all ingredients together in a large bowl.
2. Add a dash of terror.
3. Stir counterclockwise for 17 minutes.
4. Serve in a bowl of darkness.

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