UPGRADE YOUR CPU
Are you tired of waiting for your computer to do the simplest tasks? Do you find yourself longing for a processor that can keep up with your caffeine-fueled productivity?
We have just the thing: the Quantum Processor, a CPU that's been upgraded with the latest in quantum computing technology.
With its ability to process an infinite number of calculations simultaneously, you'll be able to:
- Download entire libraries of cat videos in under a second
- Render 1000's of cat memes at once
- Crack the perfect code to unlock the secrets of the universe
But wait, there's more! Our Quantum Processor also comes with:
- A built-in coffee machine that dispenses exactly 3.14 cups of coffee per hour
- A personalized assistant that will order pizza for you every Thursday at 3 PM
- A built-in cat video player that auto-plays the entirety of Garfield on repeat