Using Folding as Self-Defense: The Unconventional Art of Wrangling Your Foe

Folding, the art of compacting oneself into an impenetrable, origami fortress. Not for defense against the elements, but for defense against your aunt at the family reunion.

Step 1: Choose your folding material wisely. A durable fabric like cardboard or a well-placed pizza box will suffice.

Step 2: Compact your body into an origami configuration, minimizing surface area. This will make you harder to grasp and less likely to be picked up.

Step 3: Utilize your limbs as makeshift flailing appendages, keeping the would-be assailant at bay.

Folding Techniques for more advanced methods, including the "Crane" and "Box" folds. Troubling Your Aunt: A Guide for the Clumsy and the Clueless