ABNORMAL USE: Warranty Exclusions

For warranty claims that defy the laws of physics, logic, and sanity.

Examples of abnormal use include, but are not limited to:

• Riding a unicycle on the edge of a pool of lava while wearing a fedora.
• Using our widgets to hold back a tidal wave of despair.
• Operating a chainsaw while blindfolded and reciting the entirety of "The Iliad".

See also: Extra-Terrestrial Use

Or: Paranoid Perpetration

Or: Quantum Entanglement

Standard Use is just for suckers.

© 2023 ABNORMAL USE, Inc.