Don't Do This

Coffee. No, seriously, don't even look at the coffee. Don't think about it, don't dream about it, don't even think about thinking about it. Coffee is the enemy of a good breakfast.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What about tea? Is tea okay?

A: No. Tea is just a sad, apologetic cousin of coffee. Do not trust tea.

Caveats

We do not endorse or condone the consumption of actual coffee on this site. Please consult a medical professional or a responsible adult for advice on what to do instead.