What We Should Be Eating

You Should Probably Be Eating:

Overrated Sushi - For the thrill of eating something that's been sitting in the fridge since the Clinton administration.

Artisanal Cheese Puffs - Because who needs actual artisanal skills when you can just sprinkle some thyme on top?

Veggie Burgers of Doom - A patty of disappointment, served on a bed of despair.

It turns out we should be eating more things with 'artisanal' in the name, and less things with 'veggie' in the name.