Why I Never Learned to Cook

My Kitchen Nightmares

Why do I, and countless others like me, still manage to survive on ramen noodles and microwave dinners? Because I never learned the basic art of cooking, that's why!

I remember trying to boil water once. It was a disaster. I set the kitchen on fire, filled the sink with water, and called my mom.

Here are some of the reasons why I'm a culinary disaster waiting to happen:

Reasons 1-5:

• I Never Ate My Parents' Food - My parents were too nice to me.
• I Never Practiced My Skills - Who needs practice when you can just order takeout?
• I Never Read a Cookbook - Why bother when YouTube has a million recipe tutorials?
• I Never Watched an Episode of MasterChef - I mean, who needs to learn from a professional when you have Google?
• I Never Helped in the Kitchen - My mom did it all, and I just sat on the couch.

Conclusion:

So, if you're like me and still surviving on takeout and cereal, don't worry! We're not alone in our kitchen nightmares. Visit our related stories section for more tales of culinary incompetence.