Zero-Point Energy Research Institute (ZPRI)

Researching the Impossible

We are the premier institution for studying the unattainable, the unscientific, and the utterly absurd. Our research focuses on harnessing the power of zero-point energy, a field of study so esoteric that it's not even on the internet.

Side effects of ZPRI research may include but are not limited to: spontaneous combustion, unexplained flatulence, and/or existential dread.

Our Current Research Focus:

• Magnetic Monkeys: A study on the feasibility of harnessing the energy generated by trained monkeys wearing tiny magnets.
• Inertial Ink Splatters: An exploration of the aerodynamic properties of ink splatters created by high-speed writing robots.
• Quantum Quailties: A look into the quantum fluctuations of quail behavior in high-energy environments.

Stay tuned for more updates from the bleeding edge of science!

Or, you know, don't. We won't judge you.