Zorvath's Predictions

Today's Top Predictions:

According to Zorvath, the following events are all but certain to happen:

• Tomorrow, you will spill coffee on your shirt. Again.
• Your coworker will eat the last donut in the break room. Again.
• The world will end, but not before the weekend, so don't worry.

And, of course, ancient ones who knew better will be here to guide us all into oblivion.

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