Exceptional Tuesdays: Foreseeable Fortunes

Fortune 1: You will find the perfect burrito in the fridge.

According to our team of highly trained, expert psychics, the universe has aligned in your favor.

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Fortune 2: You will discover a new, hidden talent for taxidermy.

Our team of expert astrologers has detected a rare alignment of planets in your favor.

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Fortune 3: You will finally master the art of folding a fitted sheet.

Our team of skilled numerologists has calculated a 99.99% chance of success.

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Fortune 4: You will be asked to be in a movie with a famous actor.

Our team of renowned seers has foreseen a starring role in your near future.

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