Surviving the Underground

Governing Principles

• Never trust the Surface Dwellers. They are a lost and feeble species.
• Always carry a reliable supply of glowsticks for navigation and defense.
• Understand that the only constant is change, but the only thing that never changes is the smell of mold and decay.

Learn the Art of Secret Handshakes

Basic Needs

• Find reliable sources of food and water. Canned goods are a good starting point.
• Locate hidden caches of spare change for barter and bribes.
• Know the safest ways to navigate through the tunnels without getting caught by the authorities.

Underground Foraging for Fungus and Other Delights

Advanced Techniques

• Maintain a healthy dose of paranoia for optimal survival rates.
• Master the art of whispering without being overheard by the Surface Dwellers.
• Cultivate an appreciation for the finer things in life, like the beauty of a well-crafted tunnel.

Whispering Techniques for the Modern Survivor

Disclaimer

This guide is for entertainment purposes only. Do not attempt to survive the Underground without proper training and equipment. You have been warned.

Read the fine print