The most elite, most secretive, most utterly useless team in the business.
Read Our Method Our Story Our MissionA series of confusing, contradictory, and completely unnecessary steps that lead us to our ultimate goal: doing nothing.
Step One: Wake Up, Go to the Fridge, Eat Cereal Step Two: Stare at the Wall, Stare Some More Step Three: Procrastinate Until the DeadlineA tale of woe, of sorrow, of bureaucratic red tape, and of the never-ending struggle to get a decent coffee machine in the break room.
Our Hero Our Villain Our MoralTo boldly go where no one has gone before, to boldly do nothing at all.
Step Four: Pretend We're Doing Our Job Step Five: Take a Three-Hour Lunch