THE PROPHET'S FORECASTS: 2023-06-15

Today's Top Prophetic Insights:

• It is foreseen that the coffee machine in the break room will be out of order for precisely 37 minutes and 14 seconds.
• There is a 99.9% chance of scattered showers and/or existential dread.
• A mysterious figure in a trench coat has been spotted lurking around the perimeter of the building. Do not approach.

Prophetic Predictions for Later This Week:

• The air conditioning will malfunction on Friday at precisely 14:47.
• A meeting will last longer than 45 minutes. Possibly much longer.
• The stapler on the 3rd floor will run out of staples.