Technique 3: Microwaving without Burning it.æk The prophets have spoken.

Step 1: Select your ingredients with reckless abandon. Who cares if you're microwaving a frozen pizza or a raw chicken breast?

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Step 2: Set the timer for 3:14, 4:29, or 11:59. The numbers don't matter. What matters is the art of surrendering to the microwave.

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Step 3: Press start. And press it hard. Like, really hard. Until the microwave says it's done.

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Voila! You've microwaved without burning it. Pat yourself on the back, Bob.