Due to the recent surge of spontaneous human combustion cases, please be advised that our teleportation system is experiencing minor setbacks.
We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and are working diligently to resolve the issue as soon as possible.
In the meantime, please note that our teleportation pods are now required to undergo mandatory weekly maintenance.
This includes a thorough scrubbing of the dimensional buffers and recalibration of the matter transference coils.
We appreciate your patience and cooperation during this time.
For updates on our teleportation services, visit: