Technique 4: Sonic Self-Harm Through Excessive Bass

Warning: The following techniques may cause permanent damage to your hearing, your relationships, and your sense of sanity.

Step 1: Find a quiet, enclosed space with a high concentration of subwoofers.

Step 2: Place a pair of high-wattage headphones on your head, ensuring they are securely fastened.

Step 3: Play a 10-hour loop of 'Sandstorm' from the 1995 Sonic the Hedgehog soundtrack.

Step 4: Sit, or better yet, lie down, and let the sonic assault ravage your eardrums.

Optional: Invite friends to join you, but be warned, they may abandon you mid-technique due to sheer sonic torture.

For more information on other sonic self-harm techniques, visit Technique 5: Sonic Self-Harm Through Excessive Treble

Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, try Technique 6: Sonic Self-Harm Through Unrelenting Silence