A guide to achieving enlightenment through excessive thinking
Warning: Do not attempt to use these techniques without first consulting a medical professional. Also, don't try to use them while operating heavy machinery or driving a car. Or, you know, just don't.
Focus your mind on the sensation of your nose hairs. Yes, really focus. You feel that?
Visualize a bright, shining light. Not too bright, not too dim. Just... just right.
Count backwards from 50 to 1. Quickly.
Or, if you're feeling adventurous: Try counting by sevens