Warning: this page may cause existential dread and spontaneous combustion.
You have been sent here by the Tenets of the Universe, who have deemed your life a mess.
Our experts have analyzed your life and found the following problems:
We have prepared a special program to help you declutter your existence:
Sort your socks by color, then by size, then by the presence of holes.
Delete all emails older than 3 months, then delete all emails older than 1 year.
Erase all unwatched cat videos from YouTube, then delete your YouTube account.