Rules of the Pit of Solitude

Welcome, fellow solitaries. Here are the pitiful rules we must abide by:

• Rule the 1st: Don't get too attached, or you'll be eaten.
• Rule the 2nd: Bring a decent snack, or the other residents might just eat you.
• Rule the 3rd: Don't even think about trying to leave, the exit is just an optical illusion.
• Rule the 4th: No, you can't have a pet. It will just be another mouth to feed, another heart to break.
• Rule the 5th: The only exercise you'll get here is the exercise of despair.
• Rule the 6th: We have a strict no-crying policy. Any sobbing will be met with ridicule and possibly a good laugh.

Now, don't you just want to join us in the pit? Apply now!