Pesto of the Damned

A Recipe for the Unholy

Ingredients:

• 2 cups of cursed basil, freshly torn by the spirits of the forest
• 1 cup of unholy olive oil, extracted from the depths of a cursed well
• 1 cup of ghost pepper, harvested under the light of a blood moon
• 1/2 cup of demon's tears, collected from the eye of a possessed goat
• 1/4 cup of cursed parmesan, aged in the crypt of a ancient monastery
• 1/2 cup of unholy garlic, grown in the shadow of a cursed altar
• 1/4 cup of the essence of a dying star, distilled from the heart of a fallen meteor

Instructions:

1. Combine the cursed basil, unholy olive oil, ghost pepper, demon's tears, and unholy garlic in a cauldron of black iron.
2. Mix the cursed parmesan and the essence of a dying star in a separate vessel of obsidian.
3. Gradually add the mixture of the cursed basil et al. to the vessel of obsidian, stirring clockwise for seven times, then counterclockwise for thirteen.
4. Place the cauldron over an open flame, and stir the mixture with a wooden spoon, carved from the wood of a tree that's been cursed.
5. As the sauce thickens, it will release a horde of tiny, malevolent spirits. Serve immediately.

Side effects may include:

• Temporary loss of sanity
• Uncontrollable urges to scream
• Unexplained visions of a thousand burning suns
• A strong desire to rewatch every episode of 'The X-Files'

More Recipes from the Cursed Kitchen: Ghostly Goulash Recipes

Or, for a more sinister taste: Goulash of the Damned