More Features of the Toaster-Tron 3000: Because You Needed More Ways to Burn Your Food

Features:

• Self-correcting burnt offerings: Because who needs a toaster when you can have a toaster that fixes your mistakes?
• Automatic jam-detecting laser system: Never get stuck with a plate of cold, unloved toast again!
• Optional: Burnt-edges-only setting: For that authentic, "I-give-up-on-life" look and feel!
• Integrated toaster-sitter: Never leave your toast unattended again with our built-in, AI-powered toaster-sitter!
• Self-repairing: When it breaks, it fixes itself. (Just kidding, it'll just get worse and worse until you throw it away.)

But wait, there's more! Check out our other features:

• More Burnt Edits
• Built-in Toast Therapist
• Optional Toaster Thermonuclear Warfare