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Are you tired of the monotony? Do you need a jolt of energy to make it through the day? Look no further! Caffeine Replacement Therapy (CRT) is here to help you replace the need for that pesky ol' caffeine with our scientifically-proven (not actually proven, but we're working on it) methods of stimulation.

Our expert team of highly-trained professionals (we're not really trained, but we're highly motivated) will guide you through our 5-step program:

1. Step 1: The Aromatherapy of Doom - Inhale the scent of freshly-brewed coffee, without the coffee.
2. Step 2: The Power of Puppies - Cuddle a puppy, and get your heart pumping!
3. Step 3: The Dance of the Ancients - Shake your booty to the rhythms of our ancient ancestors!
4. Step 4: The Power of Puns - Laugh, laugh, LAUGH at our dad jokes!
5. Step 5: The Final Countdown - Count down to your new, caffeine-free life!