ARTICLE 1: We, the Underground Bunker, reject the tyranny of the above-ground dwellers. We demand a better way of life, with more cheese, more tunnels, and fewer fluorescent lights.
ARTICLE 2: We will no longer be held captive by the whims of the sun. We shall live in the shadows, where the only light is the glow of our screens.
ARTICLE 3: All citizens of the Underground Bunker shall have access to an endless supply of stale bread and warm, stale air. We will not be silenced by the blandishments of the surface world.
Beneath the Surface of our revolution lies a world of wonder and despair.
Secret Societies of the Underground Bunker are always open for recruitment.