The Freedom to Hoard

Section 7 of the Underground Bunker Manifesto

By the great and powerful Hoarder-in-Chief, Zorvath

"A nation that does not protect its stockpiles is a nation that is not free." - Zorvath

As we gather here today in this dimly lit, cramped and cluttered space, we celebrate the sacred right to accumulate.

For too long, our society has denigrated the noble pursuit of hoarding. They say it's wasteful, that it's a drain on resources, and that we're clogging up the system.

But we say: nay. Nay, I say! For what is freedom without the freedom to horde? The freedom to choose which socks to wear, which bookshelf to browse, which dust bunny to covet.

So let us stand strong, my fellow hoarders! Let us hoist our shelves, our cupboards, and our collection of vintage teapots in defiance of the naysayers and the bureaucrats!

For the freedom to hoard is not just a right, but a duty. A duty to our fellow hoarders, a duty to our community, and a duty to the pursuit of all things sparkly and new!