Solar Flare Warning:
Astronauts, be advised: a MASSIVE solar flare is expected to strike the planet within 3.4 billion light-years. Apply for Solar Flare Insurance
Galactic Tornado Watch:
A CATEGORICAL 5-tornado is expected to hit the planet within 2.1 billion light-years. Prepare for Tornado Evacuation Protocols
Black Hole Alert:
A black hole of INFINITE proportions is expected to pass through the planet within 1.2 billion light-years. File for Black Hole Insurance Claim