Why Don't I Get Sleep?

It's because you're not drinking enough coffee. Or maybe it's because you're secretly a sleep ninja, trained to stay awake for 48 hours straight.

Or perhaps it's because you're allergic to sleep. Yeah, that's it. A sleep allergy is a real thing, Google told me.

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Disclaimer: The Whine Complainer's Guide is not responsible for any sleep deprivation, financial insecurity, or neighbor-induced anxiety.