We are currently experiencing a severe case of existential crisis. Our inventory is in shambles, our fashion sense is questionable, and our designer labels are on the fritz.

• Over 9000 pairs of distressed denim were last seen fleeing the premises in a desperate bid for freedom.
• Our CEO, a self-taught expert in the field of "fashion", has gone missing in action, leaving us with a gaping hole in the company's psyche.
• The air conditioning system has broken, causing our mannequins to sweat profusely, and our sales team to wilt under the strain.