Because you're probably dead by now
Q: What's the deal with all these zombies?
A: Well, it's a long story, but let's just say they were once humans, just like you.
Q: Are they going to eat me?
A: Only if you're made of meat
Q: How can I survive the apocalyptic hellscape?
A: Check our comprehensive guide
Q: Is there a cure?
A: No. Just accept your fate and enjoy the silver linings