Procrastination Is My Love Language

Procrastination: the ultimate love language. Whereby "love" means "avoiding actual love, affection, and human interaction at all costs.

Here are some reasons why I'm in love with procrastination:

It's like a warm hug for my soul, a comforting blanket for my anxiety.
I get to spend more time with my favorite video game character, "Myself".
It's a great excuse to avoid actual work, which is just a never-ending cycle of existential dread and crushing disappointment.
Procrastination is the only love I've ever really understood, the only language that truly speaks to me.

Subpages: