Avoid getting within 10 parsecs of a black hole's event horizon. Trust us, it's not worth it. You'll either get sucked in or end up as a cosmic dust particle. Your call.

Avoid getting caught in the center of a black hole. It's like trying to take a selfie with a really strong magnet. Not pretty.

You never know when you'll get stuck in a time loop. Bring a snack, or two, or three. Time travel can be hungry work.

It's just space, it's just matter, it's just energy... and it's all about to get sucked into a black hole. But hey, at least you'll be in good company. Think of all the other souls who've gone before you.

You might get stretched and compressed like a cosmic pancake. Just go with it. You might even find a new sense of purpose in the crushing vastness of space.

Signal won't work. Don't bother. Just face the void and its infinite, crushing silence. Or, you know, just don't.

Black holes love a good jam session. Bring your favorite space tunes and get the party started.

You might get a little stretched out. Just go with it. The more fabric distortion, the better the party.

Alcohol won't help you escape, but it'll make the whole experience more enjoyable. Just don't say we didn't warn you.

It's just a matter of time. You might get sucked in. But hey, at least you'll have a good story to tell.