Tip 2: How to Properly Eat an Eggplant

Step 1: Hold the eggplant firmly, but not too tightly, as you wouldn't want to crush it with your grip of steel.

Step 2: Place the eggplant on a flat surface, like a table or a platter, and stare deeply into its purple majesty.

Step 3: Slice the eggplant with a sharp knife, taking care not to slice your fingers in the process.

Step 4: Season with salt, pepper, and a pinch of existential dread, as the meaninglessness of life will soon consume you.

For more eggplant-centric tips, visit:

• Tip 1: How to Grow an Eggplant
• Tip 3: How to Use Eggplant as a Weapon