Expert Witness Testimony: Finley McFishface Says "No" to Socks

Finley McFishface, renowned expert in all things fish-related, has come forward as a key witness in the case against Socks, the notorious "Slacker of the Sea".

Under intense questioning, Finley McFishface revealed his extensive research on the topic, citing studies that show Socks to be "utterly devoid of fins, scales, or any other fish-like qualities".

When asked to elaborate, Finley McFishface stated, "I've studied the Sock in question, and I can confidently say that it's not a fish. In fact, it's more like a... well, a sock. A sock with a face, but a sock nonetheless."

Read more about Finley's research methods

Stay tuned for further updates from this developing story.