Our Policy

A Guide to Doing the Absolute Minimum

As a Deputy Denials Officer, you are tasked with the sacred duty of saying "no" to the most absurd requests imaginable.

Below is a list of our official policy on when to deny requests:

• If it's Tuesday, deny it.
• If it's a request for more cats, deny it.
• If the request is made by a robot, deny it.

Note that this policy is completely and utterly subject to revision at any time, without warning or explanation.

For more information, please refer to our Procedure page.

Or, if you're feeling particularly feisty, you can reverse our policy on a whim.