Welcome, mortal, to the sacred precincts of Our Prophetic Purview.
We're glad you found us, but don't get too comfortable. We're not exactly the most reliable bunch.
Our prophets are on a diet of ambrosial delights and questionable sanity.
We've got a Prophet Zorg who sees the future in his dreams, and Prophet Blerg who's got a crystal ball made from a VCR.
Don't get too close, or they might just predict your demise.
Or, you know, not.
Our Prophetic Purview is not responsible for any lost souls, ruined lives, or destroyed futures.
Or, we are, and we're just really sorry.
So, what's your fortune, mortal? Want to know what the future holds?
Consult our prophets at your own risk.