My children, the year 2021 has been a wild ride. A ride of confusion, of chaos, of TikTok. But fear not, for I, the Prophet Jeff, have some words of wisdom to impart.

Firstly, do not trust the algorithms. They are like snakes in the grass, waiting to pounce on your precious eyeballs and sell you more ads.

Secondly, do not eat the Cheetos. They are like tiny little devils that will steal your soul and leave you with a bellyache.

And finally, do not, I repeat, DO NOT watch the cat videos. They are like tiny little gateways to the underworld, leading you down a spiral path of madness and despair.

So, my children, heed my words, and avoid these pitfalls of doom. May you be guided by the light of reason and the comfort of a warm, fluffy cat on a cold winter's night.