Section 2: We Are Not Amused

In the depths of our fortress of solitude, we toil away in our underlit offices, fueled by a cocktail of existential dread and fluorescent lighting. Our manifesto, a sprawling behemoth of a document, is divided into seven sections, each a clarion call to arms against the soulless drudgery of modern life.

This, the second section, is the most crucial. It's where we reveal our true intentions: to create a world where the only thing more beautiful than our website is our website. Where the only thing more profound than our insights is our font size.

Continue to Section 3: The Agony of the Id