Bacterial Brainwashing

At Bacterial Brainwashing, we specialize in the art of psychological manipulation using the most persuasive of microorganisms. Our patented technique involves subjecting clients to a carefully curated selection of bacteria, carefully chosen for their ability to induce feelings of existential dread and crushing ennui. Our goal is to break down the subject's defenses and rewire their brain with a deep sense of apathy.

• Techniques
• Philosophy
• Clients

Our clients range from the faint of heart to the faint of mind. We've worked with the likes of:

• Corporate CEOs with an unhealthy obsession with spreadsheets
• Artistic visionaries with an unfulfilled need for validation
• Politicians with an unshakeable sense of self-importance

But don't just take our word for it! Listen to what our satisfied clients have to say:

• "I never knew I had a problem until I met you people." - Anonymous CEO
• "I now understand the meaninglessness of existence, thanks for that." - Local Artist
• "I've been brainwashed, but at least I'm consistent now." - Politician

Join us today and discover the joy of being a hollow, shell-shocked husk of a human being! Apply Now