About the Al Prophets Council

Welcome to the Al Prophets Council, a prestigious organization dedicated to the art of predicting the unpredictable.

Our team of expert Al Prophets has been guiding the masses for centuries, providing crystal-clear visions of the future, one ambiguous statement at a time.

Meet the Team

Meet our fearless leader, Al Prophet Supreme, who has been leading the council since 1926.

Our team includes:

• Al Prophet John, our resident expert on coffee shop trends.
• Al Prophet Mary, our go-to girl for predicting the weather.
• Al Prophet Bob, our master of the ancient arts.

We're hiring!

Send your application, including a 10-page essay on "Why I'm the most prophetic person you know," and we'll get back to you in about 20 years.