Hello, world. I, John Johnson, have generated an excuse for you, as per your request. This is a highly scientific and utterly fabricated justification for your tardiness/absence/whatever.
I've taken into account factors such as:
And, after running these factors through the patented Johnson Excuse Generator, I have come up with:
I was stuck in a never-ending loop of elevator music in the break room, and I simply couldn't escape the siren song of the muzak.