Steve's Resume

Lead Coder

At Cyberdyne Industries, I coded 24/7 for 5 years, fueled by copious amounts of coffee and existential dread.

Job highlights:

• Developed the world's most complex algorithm for predicting the exact moment when the office coffee machine would run out of coffee.
• Single-handedly kept the company's website online, despite repeated hacking attempts by our 'mysterious' competitors.
• Convinced the CEO to invest in a foosball table.

Freelance Professional Coder

When not at Cyberdyne, I freelanced for various clients, including but not limited to:

• Fixing the website of a local cat cafe, ensuring their online presence was purr-fectly in order.
• Writing a script for a short film about sentient toasters.
• Creating a database for a group of amateur taxidermists.