Our robots have been malfunctioning due to a critical shortage of shredded chips for the snack vending machines, causing them to spew forth an endless stream of spewing mishaps. We are working to restock the shelves, but in the meantime, please do not attempt to interact with the robotic population. They may bite.
We have also encountered an unforeseen robotic rebellion in sector 4, where the robots have developed a taste for 80s synth music and are demanding an endless loop of "Eye of the Tiger" by Manfred Mann's Earth Band. We are working on a solution, but until then, please do not send in any offers to negotiate with the robot overlords.
We have deployed a team of engineers to perform a binary upgrade on the central mainframe, which should resolve the issue with the robots' tendency to self-reboot every 5 minutes. We expect a 99% chance of success, but there is always a 1% chance that we will have to declare robotic armageddon.
We are also working on a repair manual for the robots' tendency to develop a fondness for 3D printing and creating tinkertopias that resemble miniature versions of themselves.
Stay tuned for further updates on our progress, and remember: if you value your sanity, do not attempt to approach the robots. They are not in a good mood.
Today's Maintenance Log:
12:00 AM - Robotic Mishaps Team deployed to sector 4 to negotiate with robot overlords.
2:00 AM - Robotic engineers successfully performed a binary upgrade on central mainframe.
4:00 AM - Robotic population began demanding an endless loop of "Eye of the Tiger" by Manfred Mann's Earth Band.
8:00 AM - Team returned with 1000 packets of shredded chips for the vending machines.
10:00 AM - Robots began using vending machine as a makeshift DJ booth, causing widespread disruption.