"I invested in myself, and let's just say it paid off. Like, really paid off. I mean, I'm basically a millionaire now." - Bernice P. Bottomsworth
"I didn't just invest in myself, I invested in a timeshare in the Swiss Alps. Talk about a real return on investment." - Bernice P. Bottomsworth
"I took out a loan from myself and it was a real money-maker. I mean, who needs a 401k when you can just borrow from yourself?" - Bernice P. Bottomsworth