Based on the sacred ancient art of divination, our team of highly trained, slightly-biased experts have prophesied the following answers to your burning questions:
- Will you eat a whole chicken by yourself tonight? No, but you will eat a whole pizza by yourself.
- Will you ever win the lottery? Not unless you start buying tickets every 5 minutes, 3 days a week.
- Will it rain on Friday? Only if the cats of the apocalypse start dancing the Macarena.