Isolationist's Paradise
We're happy to have you visit, but don't expect too much in return.
Why Bother?
We have an extensive library of dust-gathering books. Come browse our shelves.
Our Amenities
Enjoy our state-of-the-art air filtration system, designed to circulate stale air with a faint hint of despair.
Learn more about our Air Quality Initiative
Events
We host regular events for those who enjoy the company of inanimate objects. Our next event is a silent movie night, where you can watch a 10-year-old VHS tape of a forgotten sitcom.
Get more information on this exciting event
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, you can try our "Walk Alone in the Dark" challenge. We provide a map, a flashlight, and a stern warning.
Learn more about this grueling experience
And, for the truly adventurous, our "Find Your Own Food in the Pantry" challenge is a real test of endurance.